It’’s Your Turn: The Real How-To on Adulting

分類:

  美國名校史丹佛大學獲獎輔導主任茱莉.李斯寇特-漢姆斯,在暢銷舊作《如何養出一個成年人》探討直升機父母為孩子帶來的傷害,在亞馬遜獲得近8成讀者滿5星好評。此次她在新作中,進一步提出大哉問:「『長成大人』意謂什麼?」

  20世紀的心理學家提出了5項判定「成人」的指標:完成學業、找到工作、離開家、結婚以及生孩子。然而隨著時代改變,這些指標僅是人們的「選擇」,即使人們最終走上這些道路,也不代表他們因此是「成人」。

  作者觀察到許多20至30世代的人們試著透過這些指標,扮演「成人」的角色,內心卻陷入焦慮、壓力和不安的掙扎中,本書透過作者親身經驗、實際可行的方法,以及數十位不同背景受訪者的精彩故事,引導讀者踏上真正的「成人之路」。

  讀者跟著本書的步驟實踐,將深刻理解「長成大人」與人生清單條列的目標無關,而是人們隨時間推移、逐漸變好的過程,讓自己面對未知數更加泰然自若,並獲得知識持續前進。

各界好評:

  「李斯寇特-漢姆斯以坦率及謙遜的筆觸,分享自己的掙扎與成功。她身為黑人、混血兒和酷兒,面臨了諸多挑戰,也承接了關於性別、性、文化等負責議題。成功對她而言是成就感,而非金錢。李斯寇特-漢姆斯以直接、激勵人心和誠懇的建議,探討許多敏感、關乎你我、極其重要的議題。」—美國圖書館協會出版物Booklist

  「人不會隨著年齡增長而自然而然地『長成大人』。本如何養出一個成年人書緩解了成為大人時經歷的痛苦掙扎,作者筆觸極具耐心、敏感、一針見血又激勵人心。 她的前作《如何養出一個成年人》著墨直升機父母。 而這本新書則是指引我們邁向成人之路,接招吧。」—獲選《時代》雜誌2020年最具影響力百大人物Ibram X. Kendi

  「李斯寇特-漢姆斯始終是美國最優異且言詞生猛的作家之一。她在本書化為年輕世代的心靈導師,透過振奮人心且令人安心的實踐手法,改變許多人的生命。」—《未來在等待的銷售人才》、《什麼時候是好時候:掌握完美時機的科學祕密》暢銷作家Daniel H. Pink

  「李斯寇特-漢姆終於創作了一本年輕人必讀的成年人手冊了。本書涵蓋工作、財務、人際關係和情感健康等內容。李斯寇特-漢姆斯在本書裡既是諮商師,又是睿智的老朋友,讓試圖釐清生活為何物的我們從中受益。」—《也許你該找人聊聊:一個諮商心理師與她的心理師,以及我們的生活》暢銷作家Lori Gottlieb

  New York Times bestselling author Julie Lythcott-Haims is back with a groundbreakingly frank guide to being a grown-up

  What does it mean to be an adult? In the twentieth century, psychologists came up with five markers of adulthood: finish your education, get a job, leave home, marry, and have children. Since then, every generation has been held to those same markers. Yet so much has changed about the world and living in it since that sequence was formulated. All of those markers are choices, and they’re all valid, but any one person’s choices along those lines do not make them more or less an adult.

  A former Stanford dean of freshmen and undergraduate advising and author of the perennial bestseller How to Raise an Adult and of the lauded memoir Real American, Julie Lythcott-Haims has encountered hundreds of twentysomethings (and thirtysomethings, too), who, faced with those markers, feel they’re just playing the part of “adult,” while struggling with anxiety, stress, and general unease. In Your Turn, Julie offers compassion, personal experience, and practical strategies for living a more authentic adulthood, as well as inspiration through interviews with dozens of voices from the rich diversity of the human population who have successfully launched their adult lives.

  Being an adult, it turns out, is not about any particular checklist; it is, instead, a process, one you can get progressively better at over time―becoming more comfortable with uncertainty and gaining the knowhow to keep going. Once you begin to practice it, being an adult becomes the most complicated yet also the most abundantly rewarding and natural thing. And Julie Lythcott-Haims is here to help readers take their turn.